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Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Things I've Learned

As it turns out, death is certainly a process. Practically and philosophically speaking. In true blogger form- here are the things I've learned (all serious, some intended to be funny, so it's ok to laugh):


  • Funerals are expensive. Probably unnecessarily so. But who's going to question the prices or shop around at a time like that?
  • It only takes a phone call to withdraw someone from school when they die.
  • HOWEVER- it takes a complete medical history, copy of the death certificate, funeral director's mother's maiden name, your right arm, left leg, and a pound of flesh to fly in for the funeral. Seriously- Read my friend Shannon's blog about my attempt at flying home. Then, NEVER fly Delta or Northwest, or any of their partner airlines again. I forbid it.
  • I will always write, "no card" or "n/c" in the guest book at a funeral. The idea of writing all those thank you cards is completely overwhelming.
  • Also, I pledge to not bring fried chicken when someone dies. Someone probably already has. Any variety of potato is always safe though.
  • It is REALLY easy to figure out what your unhealthy stress coping mechanism is. My mom smokes. I eat. A lot. And sleep a lot. Which is a really bad combination. I'll be joining Bearcycle when I return for sure.
  • The things people do things for you, like bring you food, send flowers, hugs, tears, and prayers mean a lot more than they think they do.
  • Bubbly people might consider a class in appropriateness. Ask me about my Dad's call to the benefit's people at Toyota.
I might have more to add to this list later. I am grateful for all the prayers, calls, texts, flowers, cards, etc from those in our lives over the last 6 days (hard to believe it hasn't even been a week). I am also glad to be in a family where we can cry and laugh together. Richard was a much bigger fan of laughter and joy than tears, so it seems fitting to remember to laugh. Here is a link to some pictures I put up on Facebook. He was clearly more photogenic than I was or am. Thank you all for praying for my family- it really does make a difference.

4 comments:

Shannon said...

Those are great pictures of you AND of your brother! :) Some classic Sarah faces, I love it! :) Oh, and thanks for adding the album to your blog (for those of us who have deactivated our facebook accounts) ;)

Holly said...

Sarah,
I have always loved your humor and your honesty! It's what makes you so approachable and gifted. I heard a song called "Song of The Beautiful" off Christy Nockel's new album this week and thought of you.

We are here for you...
Love,
Holly

P.S. Tuck misses you!

Anonymous said...

Sarah,
Please add us to the NO CARD list! I don't really think you're expected to send cards to everyone who stops by the funeral home, only those who send flowers or food. That would be crazy! I always thought people signed the book just so you could have a record of everyone who came by to pay respects.
Keeping you, your Mom, and Dad in thought and prayer -

Love ya,
Aunt Ann

Joe said...

Some things I've learned:

1. I never liked being a guest at funerals. Being the host is worse. By far. (Still trying to figure out how to report back if being the star attraction at a funeral is any better.)

2. Yes all those, "Sorry for your loss." comments do help.

3. Having people - such as my co-workers - come and cry, over a person they've never even met, is also comforting. I don't know why.

4. I've learned a lot more about the people my children have become by listening to their friends talk about them. I'm even more proud of them now than I was before. And that's saying something.

5. I'm sorry I didn't send Richard a friend request on Facebook. I was afraid he would think I was intruding into his life. I would have had a good time reading his political comments. I miss him. Go Cats.

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